It is a happy feeling to talk to your love one, even a single hi and hello would make you smile. I loved that feeling and I missed that feeling. I do not intend to make a relationship perfect, there will always be something that will most likely test both of you. Definitely hard to be in a water where you have to decide, move on or forget about it.
There are no relationships that are the same. I know for one for I couldn't find any similarity on my past relationship. Although, I am really attracted to give the last relationship I had another chance. I just have so many questions still. I also find myself demand things from him that I know he's not ready to give.
All these can somehow be what you felt. These are what I feel right now. Should I give in and what, eat my pride? Should I just let it be and look for someone else? In all of these things, I have learned to love myself more and even know myself more. I like it when I know that I am becoming more mature person. Although part of that growing is somehow changing my attitudes. I can't seem to find control in choosing my reactions especially when I get to talk to my ex. I am more of a grumpy person that I am a sweet girl to my ex. I'd love to be the same person to him but I don't want to give him the impression that I am willing to go back with him. I also have my pride and part of that pride is to make sure I won't be hurt again. I got to love the person whoever he is, yes I can do that, I simply can't give love if that person doesn't give love to himself as well. If you were the guy, you should be more stronger than the girl. That would include the fact that when you have to decide on something, make a stand and it don't matter if you are wrong or right on that decision you just have to make that stand and don't leave it all up to the power of nature or fate.
If you let "all up to you" phrases to lead your life, there wouldn't be nowhere to go to. There wouldn't be any progress and plus, guys should be strong for the relationship, and the girl should lead a relationship. This is in my opinion, you might want to react on this opinion. But it doesn't stop there, for some of the times it can be vice versa. It all depends on what you both are into. I think this is how things should be because you both love each other. This is how things should be because you both believe in each other and part of that believing is again loving each other.
You don't actually need to change, because if you were true to what you say, it will show through your actions. If you say, you'd say it all from the heart then don't answer back with "all up to you" because it is not from your heart. You'd say that only because you don't want to hurt the other party. You'd say that because you are afraid. You just have to take that risk, I definitely have decided to take that risk but it doesn't seem to be going forward. Giving lines that somehow tells what I wanted to say but it you just can't read what's between the lines because you are too busy thinking "I might hurt her again."
Getting hurt is part of everything. You can't take that out. If you don't want to hurt someone tell the truth. There's nothing wrong with telling the truth. It is a lighter feeling to tell the truth rather than to delay telling the truth. If you want to suspend telling the truth, there are a greater chances the other party would know, and would know the truth from another channel. Relationships is run by both party not by the guy or the girl.
