I wish I did not write something about this. But I always stick to the bigger goal that when writing this insight I might and could have picked up something to learn about.
It did not happen to me. It happened to somebody else. Two points are, I think, correct and can be considered right as to each stand point. Somehow things are not an advantage to both. Why did I say that? When right things clashes together, there something in that clash that just got to be wrong or not right at all.
In human ways, society set these group of righteousness but to once point of views can not be right nor correct. Example at school. We are asked to wear them all the time. That rule is somehow accepted by most but not by the remaining few. Some may not like it. I do not know their reason but as human we have got to understand and respect that. Although, the saddest point in the end is that the remaining few left no choice but to follow. No matter how many times the remaining few tried to explain their side, it is just not right nor correct for it is against the human laws which is again made up by society.
There is nothing wrong with human laws or the rules made up by society because it is for the better. We all live harmoniously only because of these laws. But, as human, we should not forget on reflecting what had happened to us earlier on (if we are on that situation where we felt we were misunderstood).
Showing posts with label Moving On. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Moving On. Show all posts
28.10.08
I Try to Change Me
I had been busy lately. I can not deny that. My life was focused on to saving more so I can gain more. Practically you can see it like investing on a stock. You tend to watch how the stock works and the bullish and the bearish ways that a particular stock can be. Hoping it will always be bullish and would never experienced going down or bearish. The more it is going up the more you think of not stopping it because you are gaining more. Your full attention are at the Bloomberg Channel or the newspapers. You might be good at calculating and predicting what will happen like those in the stock market, you just do not stop.
I was focused to that. I was focused on a straight path to where I want to be and would like to be at in few months or days if possible. I delayed my happiness in the hope to be better at this part of my life. I just totally lost who I was before.
It is not a bad thing to be at. I mean it is part of growing and some things got to changed. But changes in me was drastic. I do not even know if I have missed one meeting with friends, am I answering all their SMS or calls to me, or was I giving them lame excuses. Even if I have time to see them, my body do not seem to be interested in seeing them anymore because I have worked too much and the days that are supposed to be for leisure was spent in bed trying to recover the lost hours of sleep.
My point here is that if I am neglecting my friendship with you or you think I was getting this huge head on top of me and I am blabbing things that you think was not the original me, I am sorry. I also would like to point out that I would really want to grow and part of growing is to change. But if you think I was not changing for the better, an email, or if you know my number, a call will always be an option for you to tell me that I am way too much and it is not healthy.
I admit to be changing a lot. I have let go of my smiling avatar and decided to seldom use my smiling pics because I would want others to see me serious this time. I think that was wrong for me to do because before when I used those smiling pictures it just gave me a reminder everyday that I have to refocus and rethink everything before uttering something or even deciding on things. When I see happy faces it always make me think twice like, am I going to do this to give everyone happiness or just me?
I do believe that whenever you do something you do not only think of what it can give to you but what it can give to others that surrounds you. But when I decided to change, I have pushed that idea away and now I have realized that it was wrong. I have got to change to something better.
Then again I am human and I make mistakes and it is not too late for me to change that. I only have to admit that I made mistake and hopefully learn from that mistake and move on. Always better to admit mistake than not to.
I was focused to that. I was focused on a straight path to where I want to be and would like to be at in few months or days if possible. I delayed my happiness in the hope to be better at this part of my life. I just totally lost who I was before.
It is not a bad thing to be at. I mean it is part of growing and some things got to changed. But changes in me was drastic. I do not even know if I have missed one meeting with friends, am I answering all their SMS or calls to me, or was I giving them lame excuses. Even if I have time to see them, my body do not seem to be interested in seeing them anymore because I have worked too much and the days that are supposed to be for leisure was spent in bed trying to recover the lost hours of sleep.
My point here is that if I am neglecting my friendship with you or you think I was getting this huge head on top of me and I am blabbing things that you think was not the original me, I am sorry. I also would like to point out that I would really want to grow and part of growing is to change. But if you think I was not changing for the better, an email, or if you know my number, a call will always be an option for you to tell me that I am way too much and it is not healthy.
I admit to be changing a lot. I have let go of my smiling avatar and decided to seldom use my smiling pics because I would want others to see me serious this time. I think that was wrong for me to do because before when I used those smiling pictures it just gave me a reminder everyday that I have to refocus and rethink everything before uttering something or even deciding on things. When I see happy faces it always make me think twice like, am I going to do this to give everyone happiness or just me?
I do believe that whenever you do something you do not only think of what it can give to you but what it can give to others that surrounds you. But when I decided to change, I have pushed that idea away and now I have realized that it was wrong. I have got to change to something better.
Then again I am human and I make mistakes and it is not too late for me to change that. I only have to admit that I made mistake and hopefully learn from that mistake and move on. Always better to admit mistake than not to.
27.9.08
Aftermath of Quitting
I am so afraid of quitting. Normally I would like to do something for a long time but when I am finally doing and enjoying, at one point in time I just do not want to continue doing it. Inside me is a battle of whether or not to move to the next level or should I say.
After so many times of feeling down after another is like a roller coaster ride that never end. I started to view the other side of my coin, appreciating what today has for me and stop worrying about my future and lingering on my past. What makes it even worse is living everyday moving forward because you do not have any other choice after quitting.
The idea of moving on is somehow easy to think but really hard to do. Even if you tell yourself everyday that you got the best foot forward and you are going to be just alright, the other foot seems like nailed on that ground that it does not want to let go.
I got to be strong. I got to be awakened. It just got to be. (Inhale, Exhale)
25.9.08
The Last Episode
It was definitely a great talk and I love how it all end. I was able to know he don't hate me nor he admits that once in his life he called me a "bitch!" even if he don't mean to.
Pretended that I didn't know what he meant but I really want to hear him say goodbye that way I would feel there's nothing to go back to. I know he meant, "see you again soon", but for me if we see each other again soon then maybe it will be fate. Conversation has to end, it has to end because I might leave an impression that at anytime when he's no longer scared I am still there. I am the type that would only wait when I have so much time. I can wait definitely, but not when he no longer love me. I have the feeling he don't want to let go.
He knows how to find me if he really wants to. But I don't think he will. It just shows in his actions.
I'm free!
31.7.08
Reflection: Wiser Thought
I was upset yesterday. It was clearly a misunderstanding, I think, it was definitely a clash of human reactions of what they want and what they don not want. Believe me or not, it took me to think about what I should and could have learned from that until 1am. I can not believe it was that long for me to realize that it was definitely non sense.In the Office the Next Day, July 31, 2008.
She didn't say good morning to me when she came in. Or did she? Even though I was not able to set up the interview the other day, I was able to make them come again the next day to do the interview. I was glad I was able to do it. I have big ears and it can hear people talking behind my back. Not really that I have big ears physically but as a person like me who in everyday try to put that smile on her face, greeting everyone good morning, making her day as positive as possible for she know there will be a very long day of stress and pressures. I know when someone will talk something behind my back because I have somehow had a little arguement with this person. It is human nature to find someone to listen to her rant so I know she have said something, a line or two or more about how she felt about what had happened.
I expected all that to happen. I do not really feel bad when she will talk behind my back. I do not care at all for I know I have a reason why and I have the right to be upset. If that is very "not professional" or I was disrespectful, so be it. I have said my word and I have intentionally displayed that I am upset.
My thought in all of these are; you can never really dictate somehow what to do if she is not willing to do it. No matter if it will help her and the company per se, you simply could not pre-thought that she will agree with your demands even though she have wholeheartedly expressed she will help you before. Another wiser thought on what had happened, it is a typical reaction of someone who is not a pro at interviews to react as if it was the end of the world for her. Nobody wants to see themselves on tv even if she has dreamt about being on tv a hundred times, she would not be on tv when she said she will not be on tv.
Just another thought before the day ends.
I hope older people would also adjust in all situations and would not expect the younger people to adjust all the time. Education should always be a win-win education. Two people could have learned on the process. I hope.
25.7.08
I Want You Back
It is always a great feeling to be in love to somebody. In a relationship nowadays, it is hard to find someone who loves you and someone whom you love as well. Rarely, I see people in that situation. Some guys would really pursue the girls of their dreams and doesn't care if the girl either love them back or simply like them. I do not say that I know how to tell or when to tell that both are in love with each other or not.
It is a happy feeling to talk to your love one, even a single hi and hello would make you smile. I loved that feeling and I missed that feeling. I do not intend to make a relationship perfect, there will always be something that will most likely test both of you. Definitely hard to be in a water where you have to decide, move on or forget about it.
There are no relationships that are the same. I know for one for I couldn't find any similarity on my past relationship. Although, I am really attracted to give the last relationship I had another chance. I just have so many questions still. I also find myself demand things from him that I know he's not ready to give.
All these can somehow be what you felt. These are what I feel right now. Should I give in and what, eat my pride? Should I just let it be and look for someone else? In all of these things, I have learned to love myself more and even know myself more. I like it when I know that I am becoming more mature person. Although part of that growing is somehow changing my attitudes. I can't seem to find control in choosing my reactions especially when I get to talk to my ex. I am more of a grumpy person that I am a sweet girl to my ex. I'd love to be the same person to him but I don't want to give him the impression that I am willing to go back with him. I also have my pride and part of that pride is to make sure I won't be hurt again. I got to love the person whoever he is, yes I can do that, I simply can't give love if that person doesn't give love to himself as well. If you were the guy, you should be more stronger than the girl. That would include the fact that when you have to decide on something, make a stand and it don't matter if you are wrong or right on that decision you just have to make that stand and don't leave it all up to the power of nature or fate.
If you let "all up to you" phrases to lead your life, there wouldn't be nowhere to go to. There wouldn't be any progress and plus, guys should be strong for the relationship, and the girl should lead a relationship. This is in my opinion, you might want to react on this opinion. But it doesn't stop there, for some of the times it can be vice versa. It all depends on what you both are into. I think this is how things should be because you both love each other. This is how things should be because you both believe in each other and part of that believing is again loving each other.
You don't actually need to change, because if you were true to what you say, it will show through your actions. If you say, you'd say it all from the heart then don't answer back with "all up to you" because it is not from your heart. You'd say that only because you don't want to hurt the other party. You'd say that because you are afraid. You just have to take that risk, I definitely have decided to take that risk but it doesn't seem to be going forward. Giving lines that somehow tells what I wanted to say but it you just can't read what's between the lines because you are too busy thinking "I might hurt her again."
Getting hurt is part of everything. You can't take that out. If you don't want to hurt someone tell the truth. There's nothing wrong with telling the truth. It is a lighter feeling to tell the truth rather than to delay telling the truth. If you want to suspend telling the truth, there are a greater chances the other party would know, and would know the truth from another channel. Relationships is run by both party not by the guy or the girl.
It is a happy feeling to talk to your love one, even a single hi and hello would make you smile. I loved that feeling and I missed that feeling. I do not intend to make a relationship perfect, there will always be something that will most likely test both of you. Definitely hard to be in a water where you have to decide, move on or forget about it.
There are no relationships that are the same. I know for one for I couldn't find any similarity on my past relationship. Although, I am really attracted to give the last relationship I had another chance. I just have so many questions still. I also find myself demand things from him that I know he's not ready to give.
All these can somehow be what you felt. These are what I feel right now. Should I give in and what, eat my pride? Should I just let it be and look for someone else? In all of these things, I have learned to love myself more and even know myself more. I like it when I know that I am becoming more mature person. Although part of that growing is somehow changing my attitudes. I can't seem to find control in choosing my reactions especially when I get to talk to my ex. I am more of a grumpy person that I am a sweet girl to my ex. I'd love to be the same person to him but I don't want to give him the impression that I am willing to go back with him. I also have my pride and part of that pride is to make sure I won't be hurt again. I got to love the person whoever he is, yes I can do that, I simply can't give love if that person doesn't give love to himself as well. If you were the guy, you should be more stronger than the girl. That would include the fact that when you have to decide on something, make a stand and it don't matter if you are wrong or right on that decision you just have to make that stand and don't leave it all up to the power of nature or fate.
If you let "all up to you" phrases to lead your life, there wouldn't be nowhere to go to. There wouldn't be any progress and plus, guys should be strong for the relationship, and the girl should lead a relationship. This is in my opinion, you might want to react on this opinion. But it doesn't stop there, for some of the times it can be vice versa. It all depends on what you both are into. I think this is how things should be because you both love each other. This is how things should be because you both believe in each other and part of that believing is again loving each other.
You don't actually need to change, because if you were true to what you say, it will show through your actions. If you say, you'd say it all from the heart then don't answer back with "all up to you" because it is not from your heart. You'd say that only because you don't want to hurt the other party. You'd say that because you are afraid. You just have to take that risk, I definitely have decided to take that risk but it doesn't seem to be going forward. Giving lines that somehow tells what I wanted to say but it you just can't read what's between the lines because you are too busy thinking "I might hurt her again."
Getting hurt is part of everything. You can't take that out. If you don't want to hurt someone tell the truth. There's nothing wrong with telling the truth. It is a lighter feeling to tell the truth rather than to delay telling the truth. If you want to suspend telling the truth, there are a greater chances the other party would know, and would know the truth from another channel. Relationships is run by both party not by the guy or the girl.
23.6.08
Love Won't Lead You Back to Me
It has been 6 months since I last feel this pain in my heart. I thought keeping it in the closet and not digging it up helps but turns out that I am not completely healed by time yet. I have loved him and I still do. There's one thing I have learned so far though, my pain is enormous than the love I have felt for him. This pain is eating me inside out but I was able to contain the pain gradually and now I have never felt happier for my fear to deal with the pain is gone.
I know I always see him online because he's on my Skype list of friends. I have deleted my yahoo account and deleted his name on my Yahoo Messenger list. I don't know exactly how to contact him but I have decided one day to log in to Skype to see how it will all flow. He's there, online, and I said hi. I have noticed there was no anger in my words. I am happy it turned out very well.
Days had passed and I suddenly got a pop out and it was from him asking if we could be friends for life. I didn't know what he meant by that at first but as conversation goes on, he want me back. For a moment there I wanted to go back because I am happy but I can't possibly go back now. I can't be a moron again.
When he dumped me for some stupid idea of claiming others baby as their own just for the sake of getting more money is absurd. It is even more painful to think of what he just told me that he's not going to fight anymore. He said he was an asshole at that time and now that he got his brains back, he want me back. Should I just let it go by me or should I not? I should not. Definitely not. Not because he told me he need me because he love me, I should go back to him. I got my pride. I have a pride that was swallowed because I know he needed some time, but to let 4 months pass by and I have never heard anything from him should be let go? I mean, I waited for months to hear him say, I need you back. He did not even remember my birthday.
There were a lot of lies. I have known that ever since, and no matter how many times I tried to make him tell me the truth he simply don't want to give an answer to my question, in which I just let it be. I love the person but I simply could not go on to this anymore. I am young and smart and I have moved on.
27.3.08
Sweet One Week
I am happy
And busy
But you made me happy
and happier when you drop that line
So much to be true
But why not
Nothing is wrong with it
I'm too dreamy, am I?
Oopps!
"I love you so much"
Damn!
"Is that for real"
Ok
"I love you too"
Darn!
There I go again.
Don't get into fucked up situation young lady!
Of course, he never mean that!
He's fooling around!
Reality check ------ it is true.
"So you want me to choose?"
"No it is up to you'
Of course, he won't!
And he will never do that
Ding, Dong.
Special delivery
I love reality TV
Tells you to wake up
On the first floor.
Wanting to go to the second floor.
Let see...
Guess, you have to use the stairs again.
(This is how I describe the one week with you.)
And busy
But you made me happy
and happier when you drop that line
So much to be true
But why not
Nothing is wrong with it
I'm too dreamy, am I?
Oopps!
"I love you so much"
Damn!
"Is that for real"
Ok
"I love you too"
Darn!
There I go again.
Don't get into fucked up situation young lady!
Of course, he never mean that!
He's fooling around!
Reality check ------ it is true.
"So you want me to choose?"
"No it is up to you'
Of course, he won't!
And he will never do that
Ding, Dong.
Special delivery
I love reality TV
Tells you to wake up
On the first floor.
Wanting to go to the second floor.
Let see...
Guess, you have to use the stairs again.
(This is how I describe the one week with you.)
22.3.08
Broken Road
I don't know if you really follow every post that I have published on this blog. If you do, I have posted a song "Blessed the Broken Road". Here's the lyric to that song. And this post is for someone out there that made me smile these past few days. Hoping that this someone will make me smile everyday.
I set out on a narrow way many years ago
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you
Every long lost dream lead me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you
I think about the years I spent just passing through
I'd like to have the time I lost and give it back to you
But you just smile and take my hand
You've been there you understand
It's all part of a grander plan that is coming true
Every long lost dream lead me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you
I'm not perfect. I do get my ups and downs. I was playing smart that I was able to get through all adversities. Life with family, with friends, with work, with anything that revolve around me. My broken road somehow made it easy for me. Met few people that made me smile. Also met someone who made me happy and happier the next day. I do pray they won't change. I am definitely considering something and this will make me happy.
I set out on a narrow way many years ago
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you
Every long lost dream lead me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you
I think about the years I spent just passing through
I'd like to have the time I lost and give it back to you
But you just smile and take my hand
You've been there you understand
It's all part of a grander plan that is coming true
Every long lost dream lead me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you
I'm not perfect. I do get my ups and downs. I was playing smart that I was able to get through all adversities. Life with family, with friends, with work, with anything that revolve around me. My broken road somehow made it easy for me. Met few people that made me smile. Also met someone who made me happy and happier the next day. I do pray they won't change. I am definitely considering something and this will make me happy.
19.2.08
Random Thoughts....
I feel alive again....
I would like to..
Do I have to ask?
Is it gonna be a yes?
Or should I wait for *** to ask...
** said it's easier to ask now...
Do I have to wait?
Is it gonna be right to be involve again after the heartache?
Do I have to care about the past?
It is the past so I dumped it..
The battle of my heart and mind
increasing heart's beat to vanish doubting thoughts
struggling what should be done first
can't move, would want to move
sunshine it is
but there's sunset
and so the body rest for awhile
but the heart keeps on beating
while the mind is at rest
I am happy but am still afraid to ask
should I ask or should I give it awhile...
breaking the heart is easy
but giving the heart again is hard
would you dance with me?
or should I say it relentlessly..
and honestly
Maybe later
Not now for sure
later is better..
who should I choose?
that one
this one
or the another one
can't make up yet
I like this one
I like that one too
not the other one for **'s no longer free
this one is vocal
that one is not even sure what **'s feelings are
should I follow my heart?
or I should give time?
for I need time as well..
I would like to..
Do I have to ask?
Is it gonna be a yes?
Or should I wait for *** to ask...
** said it's easier to ask now...
Do I have to wait?
Is it gonna be right to be involve again after the heartache?
Do I have to care about the past?
It is the past so I dumped it..
The battle of my heart and mind
increasing heart's beat to vanish doubting thoughts
struggling what should be done first
can't move, would want to move
sunshine it is
but there's sunset
and so the body rest for awhile
but the heart keeps on beating
while the mind is at rest
I am happy but am still afraid to ask
should I ask or should I give it awhile...
breaking the heart is easy
but giving the heart again is hard
would you dance with me?
or should I say it relentlessly..
and honestly
Maybe later
Not now for sure
later is better..
who should I choose?
that one
this one
or the another one
can't make up yet
I like this one
I like that one too
not the other one for **'s no longer free
this one is vocal
that one is not even sure what **'s feelings are
should I follow my heart?
or I should give time?
for I need time as well..
15.2.08
Bless the Broken Road
My twitter buddy, @jesatiu, gave me this song.
Apparently, it made me cry. Indeed God bless the broken road, but right now, with what has been done, northern star no longer leads me back to you. Northern star might have someone else for me and I am quite excited to see that. I'm all open arms now. I welcome anybody who would boldly would ask me to dance.
I like that beat of the heart when you don't know what's next to one thing but you are sure this and that will happen only because you have seen it in the eyes of that person. Of course, you would know if he don't like you.
This is the part that I like for it is not just applicable to any broken hearted but it is actually for anything that you feel right now. You wouldn't be happy now if you were not sad yesterday. Or you wouldn't be who you are now if nobody stooped you down before. Or you wouldn't be stronger now if you weren't dumped yesterday.
It simply says, there is far more better man for me. Could it be you? (hmmmm.....)
Apparently, it made me cry. Indeed God bless the broken road, but right now, with what has been done, northern star no longer leads me back to you. Northern star might have someone else for me and I am quite excited to see that. I'm all open arms now. I welcome anybody who would boldly would ask me to dance.
I like that beat of the heart when you don't know what's next to one thing but you are sure this and that will happen only because you have seen it in the eyes of that person. Of course, you would know if he don't like you.
Every long lost dream lead me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
This is the part that I like for it is not just applicable to any broken hearted but it is actually for anything that you feel right now. You wouldn't be happy now if you were not sad yesterday. Or you wouldn't be who you are now if nobody stooped you down before. Or you wouldn't be stronger now if you weren't dumped yesterday.
It simply says, there is far more better man for me. Could it be you? (hmmmm.....)
9.1.08
6.1.08
What now (Heartbreak Poem) ?
By Edoria
I looked forward to sleep.
Sometimes I dream, and you are there.
And then
I realize,
Here's the reality of my life I've come to hate.
Careless whispers heated the coldness of my smile.
Once upon a time,
Long sexy strokes of confidence coloured my skin,
Because then,
You were there.
I don't know if I'll ever forget
How you made everything to me
Seem complete.
You were the passion underneath the harshness of those tidal waves.
They used to sink me and drown me.
And then,
You gave your breath to me,
And then
I tasted the sweet flavor of life.
Now, I need to break the intricate web,
You have woven around me.
Safety cradles me like a soft lullaby.
But then,
That was the only song I wanted to hear.
And then, you threw it away.
Bittersweet sensations,
Lingered like an unwanted scar.
You hid me far away from the painful truth,
And then
You tossed your heart high into the nighttime sky.
Far enough,
I cried because I couldn't see it.
Now, I look forward to sleep.
I can dream,
When you were there.
But like love insatiable,
You remain where memories call like haunting winds.
Sometimes I dream, and you are there.
And then
I realize,
Here's the reality of my life I've come to hate.
Careless whispers heated the coldness of my smile.
Once upon a time,
Long sexy strokes of confidence coloured my skin,
Because then,
You were there.
I don't know if I'll ever forget
How you made everything to me
Seem complete.
You were the passion underneath the harshness of those tidal waves.
They used to sink me and drown me.
And then,
You gave your breath to me,
And then
I tasted the sweet flavor of life.
Now, I need to break the intricate web,
You have woven around me.
Safety cradles me like a soft lullaby.
But then,
That was the only song I wanted to hear.
And then, you threw it away.
Bittersweet sensations,
Lingered like an unwanted scar.
You hid me far away from the painful truth,
And then
You tossed your heart high into the nighttime sky.
Far enough,
I cried because I couldn't see it.
Now, I look forward to sleep.
I can dream,
When you were there.
But like love insatiable,
You remain where memories call like haunting winds.
The end of love, the start of pain
The end of love, the start of pain
The end of love, the start of pain
The blood from my heart that now aches, stains
With the thought of your image, the thought of you care
Devoted to another, whilst my spirit is bare
Where am I to go, where is my hope now
Am I no longer important like our dedicated vows
You promised to always be there, and love me no matter what
But it seems you’ve moved on, loved another and forgot
The breakdown of our relationship, the break of my poor heart
You punctured it with your cruel ways; you stabbed it with a dart
You took away my faith, my dreams, I now have nothing left
My happiness has disappeared; a brutal act of theft
You promised to always be there, but now it all depends
On if you’ve found another love and when my heartache ends
The blood from my heart that now aches, stains
With the thought of your image, the thought of you care
Devoted to another, whilst my spirit is bare
Where am I to go, where is my hope now
Am I no longer important like our dedicated vows
You promised to always be there, and love me no matter what
But it seems you’ve moved on, loved another and forgot
The breakdown of our relationship, the break of my poor heart
You punctured it with your cruel ways; you stabbed it with a dart
You took away my faith, my dreams, I now have nothing left
My happiness has disappeared; a brutal act of theft
You promised to always be there, but now it all depends
On if you’ve found another love and when my heartache ends
BATTLE'S END
My female wiles were worthless.
The good they've done me nil.
I tried with all I have in me,
But I have lost you still.
My stubbornness was useless,
For you were stubborn too.
My tears, my pleas, as if to space,
went sailing right by you.
So now, I guess that I will wait,
For time can cure my pain.
I must convince my foolish heart.
You won't be back again.
B. V. Dahlen ©
The good they've done me nil.
I tried with all I have in me,
But I have lost you still.
My stubbornness was useless,
For you were stubborn too.
My tears, my pleas, as if to space,
went sailing right by you.
So now, I guess that I will wait,
For time can cure my pain.
I must convince my foolish heart.
You won't be back again.
B. V. Dahlen ©
5.1.08
My Version of the Jerry Maguire Movie
I love him.
I do! I love him,
and I don't care what you think.
I love him for the man he wants
to be, and for the man he almost is.
I love him, Laurel. I love him .
-Dorothy Boyd
I do! I love him,
and I don't care what you think.
I love him for the man he wants
to be, and for the man he almost is.
I love him, Laurel. I love him .
-Dorothy Boyd
Do you love her...?
Don't tell me you don't know.
-(Jerry Maguire's friend)
I don't want her to go.
We've been hanging out a lot.
-(Jerry Maguire)
We've been hanging out a lot.
-(Jerry Maguire)
That's bullshit!
You've got to be fair to her.
She loves you. If you don't
love her, you've got to tell her
-(Jerry Maguire's friend)
What if we stay together?
What if we got married?
Would you stay?
-(Jerry Maguire)
Would you stay?
-(Jerry Maguire)
No, don't do that. Don't say that.
Well... say it if you want to.
-Dorothy Boyd
Will you marry me?
-(Jerry Maguire)
-(Jerry Maguire)
Laurel! We're getting married.
-Dorothy Boyd
Loyalty... she was loyal.
Everything... grew from there.
It just... grew from there.
-(Jerry Maguire)
I jumped at your proposal
when it was still just hypothetical.
I did this, and at least
I can do something about it now.
-Dorothy Boyd
when it was still just hypothetical.
I did this, and at least
I can do something about it now.
-Dorothy Boyd
Although in the real movie of Jerry Maguire, they both end up together but with my story, we don't and we can't possibly be back with each other.
I can say I did everything to get even. I've read stories on how to turn things bad for someone who broke your heart. I know I should be hating the enemy. And these season, the holidays, birthdays coming up which I think are special, the supposed to be wedding day. Yes, men are enemies. But I have a confession to make. I love the enemy. So I would say I should just let it be.
I have to move on, I know that. I have to find someone who will tell me, I complete his life.
This will be my last post of being an "EMO" this month. I will be posting pictures that depicts my agony instead. I think I have said enough. I'll post poems, songs and anything I can find. I'll make my own designs for this feeling. I am sorry I like writing it down and since nobody in the physical world would listen to me, the internet is now my listener.
Thank you for reading.
I can say I did everything to get even. I've read stories on how to turn things bad for someone who broke your heart. I know I should be hating the enemy. And these season, the holidays, birthdays coming up which I think are special, the supposed to be wedding day. Yes, men are enemies. But I have a confession to make. I love the enemy. So I would say I should just let it be.
I have to move on, I know that. I have to find someone who will tell me, I complete his life.
This will be my last post of being an "EMO" this month. I will be posting pictures that depicts my agony instead. I think I have said enough. I'll post poems, songs and anything I can find. I'll make my own designs for this feeling. I am sorry I like writing it down and since nobody in the physical world would listen to me, the internet is now my listener.
Thank you for reading.
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