"I was cranky since yesterday. I had this feeling that something will come up. I just don't want to lose my momentum for the Saturday's event.
I was born with adversities in life, and I was able to conquer all that because I had been the hard worker nobody would think of. I see life as a challenge that needs to be conquered through hard work and dedication. Although, there had been times that I was thrown to the mud, I stood up and walk again going through the same process with a brave heart that I will soon pass the bridge of uncertainty. Once on the other end, I felt successful no matter others may call me a fool.
So much with the belief that I can do it, I put myself at the bottom, giving others the recognition that I should have. I don't want them to tell me good job because it will distract me to my purpose. A purpose not on getting achievements in paper but achievement that when I am gone, others will think of the little ways I have done for them. I certainly do not want to do things for myself alone, but would like to do it with others who are somehow will benefit in what I do.
Yes, I call myself a hero. But a hero with no name. You can laugh, you can say something cruel, but you can never bring me down. That's me. The real me.
In my past years, I have grown to be someone with courage and pessimistic with all the things I do. Most of the times, I get scared because I know I am human. And if I am down, I blame entirely the me who decides and do what I think should be done. This time its different.
I worked hard on getting things run smoothly as possible. Ask the questions I needed to ask. The real deal is, I do not have enough knowledge what I am into but with trust to the people who are with me all the way, acknowledging that they have graduated in such prestigious schools with a lot of recognition. I put my name in front, for they need me to step forward and do the guerrilla work. I have placed my entire identify by talking to people one by one. People look me in the eye, trying to see something that may mean that I lied to them. I straighten my face with honesty and truthfulness that what I am saying is true.
I've set aside other responsibilities. Then, the day to reckon for the whole year, has come.
Two days before the event, a call was answered. Good thing I was the answering machine, saying the same line over and over again. A call that made my heart beat faster and my mind was saying, I knew this would happen. I did my best to make amends. I told myself to calm down, it will push through. I stayed focus and alert. I waited.
After telling my superior what happened, my superior said it is over. My heart devastated. I can feel the pain in my shoulders now. I can feel my mind explode. A tear rolled down my eye, Saturday's event is canceled.
From the first day I put my heart into the project and now I know it is needed to packed and kept hidden. Now I asked, what could have gone wrong? How come I didn't know about this? Did I forget to ask this?
I wanted to take all the blame but it can't be. I have done my part and it is quite obvious the other party did not. Only because of some assumptions, the other party thought it is not important to discuss. My hard work, my face, my words, proved to be all wrong. I was the guerrilla, not them. I was the one in contact, not them. I was the one who has back pains, not them.
It is a wasted effort. No pain, no gain.
(Will reflect on the subject more and soon I will write posts again)
28.2.08
26.2.08
Quotes on Love
"I think God brought together two people from the opposite sides of the world from two completely different cultures, two different ways of life, two different languages, he blessed it, and he put us together, gave us a love that's strong and let us be happy."
— Robert, a U.S. Army soldier who married an Iraqi woman named Vivian
Loving is not about race, age, physical looks and etc. Loving someone is completely accepting each others looks, habit (good or bad) and I guess all of the above.
I see trees of green........ red roses too
I see em bloom..... for me and for you
And I think to myself.... what a wonderful world
Loving is not about race, age, physical looks and etc. Loving someone is completely accepting each others looks, habit (good or bad) and I guess all of the above.
I see trees of green........ red roses too
I see em bloom..... for me and for you
And I think to myself.... what a wonderful world
Change your style
Businesses need to change its headline stories into something believable again. No, honest businesses don't make up stories. I call this innovation. It is like changing clothes everyday.
Whenever there is a new building located at the main street, 95% of the passers by get curios. So they come in and ask. Maybe some will spend a penny to try what's this new product is all about or what's this new service offered.
Few months after, people will forget what you have told them. Thus this mean the business has to close down too? It will if it will not change its style.
Honestly, that's the hardest part for me as a marketing assistant. I have to think of how to change the stories. Changing in a sense that this had happened and yet was neglected and it needs to be told now or else I wouldn't be able to help the company I am to grow.
Whenever there is a new building located at the main street, 95% of the passers by get curios. So they come in and ask. Maybe some will spend a penny to try what's this new product is all about or what's this new service offered.
Few months after, people will forget what you have told them. Thus this mean the business has to close down too? It will if it will not change its style.
Honestly, that's the hardest part for me as a marketing assistant. I have to think of how to change the stories. Changing in a sense that this had happened and yet was neglected and it needs to be told now or else I wouldn't be able to help the company I am to grow.
23.2.08
What I think the child might say
I ain't married. But I took care of 2 boys while their mother and father work. And the boys' auntie in California is supporting them both. Not your ordinary story isn't it?
Right now, I do not really stay at home and watch them, the boys' Auntie hired two nannies one for each kid to watch over them. I sleep with them at nights and yes, they are scared at me. I don't blame them. I talk to them immediately whenever they commit mistakes.
Although there grandmother is till living with us, I doubt she will stay longer because she will have to follow the boys' auntie in the US. That would probably leave me as the primary guardian of the boys. Sooner, boys will leave me for the rightful caretaker. I would probably miss them.
I am not against any early marriages nor early pregnancy. What I am not in favor of is not facing the consequences of getting early into situations like having a baby or early marriages. I love kids either 5 or 7 or 12 or 18. I can attest to that. Ask my younger cousins about what I do to them, if you have contact with them.
Everyone getting into early marriages or pregnancy are adults. If they were innocent, they could have asked their mothers how to have sex. You may laugh at it but it's true. In short, they know what they've done and what could happen if they get pregnant. They just let go of the hard fact for the soft fact of it is enjoying sex itself. You know how weak human is when it comes to sex.
There are reasons why they get into it and like others tell me, it is none of my damn business. True again, but after which it had happened it is my damn business now. Why? I know for a reason I can not extend help financially and emotionally to the kids. Relatives or friends or I don't know them at all.
I did not write this post to go against the parents. In this post, I would like to express what I think the child might say.
1. Do you ever get to hear a child scream at night? I did. I don't have my own child but I sleep beside two nephews that screams at night. Not literally scream, but you know what happened when two boys are playing all day. Expect a kick in your face or a loud talking.
2. Do you ever get to experience a kid who is scared and would go under your armpit? I did. I still do, every night.
3. Do you ever get to experience not to move when you sleep for if you do you would fall or you can't really move because in your right is a wall and in your left is a little boy sleeping about the age of 5? I do, every night indeed.
Honestly, it brings to me so much happiness to see them trust me. I am the cousin of their mother and yet, when I tell them I love them, they would "I love you" back at me. When you call them and ask for a hug they would hug you back. Tightly and you would want to squeeze them too.
I missed that when they first left Davao. I will miss that again when they will leave me again. I know sooner they will. But these are all just my feelings. I didn't ask them what and how they feel.
If you could only put yourself into their situation. They'll grow and see how happy their friends family is and they don't do that with their dad or mom, only with me, the cousin of their mom. Plus I am not with them the whole day. It would probably be a lifetime to discuss about this but it definitely hurts. It hurts for my side for everyday I have grown to love them. But to think about it, the hurt they feel would probably be 300% more than what I feel.
There are a lot of situations like this in any part of the world. Battling child custody, the mother always win but the father always come to the rescue especially when the mother sees an opportunity for her to work again or to remarry again. Like I said, what do you think the child might say?
To honestly think deeper, there are more consequences to this when they start growing up.
Right now, I do not really stay at home and watch them, the boys' Auntie hired two nannies one for each kid to watch over them. I sleep with them at nights and yes, they are scared at me. I don't blame them. I talk to them immediately whenever they commit mistakes.
Although there grandmother is till living with us, I doubt she will stay longer because she will have to follow the boys' auntie in the US. That would probably leave me as the primary guardian of the boys. Sooner, boys will leave me for the rightful caretaker. I would probably miss them.
I am not against any early marriages nor early pregnancy. What I am not in favor of is not facing the consequences of getting early into situations like having a baby or early marriages. I love kids either 5 or 7 or 12 or 18. I can attest to that. Ask my younger cousins about what I do to them, if you have contact with them.
Everyone getting into early marriages or pregnancy are adults. If they were innocent, they could have asked their mothers how to have sex. You may laugh at it but it's true. In short, they know what they've done and what could happen if they get pregnant. They just let go of the hard fact for the soft fact of it is enjoying sex itself. You know how weak human is when it comes to sex.
There are reasons why they get into it and like others tell me, it is none of my damn business. True again, but after which it had happened it is my damn business now. Why? I know for a reason I can not extend help financially and emotionally to the kids. Relatives or friends or I don't know them at all.
I did not write this post to go against the parents. In this post, I would like to express what I think the child might say.
1. Do you ever get to hear a child scream at night? I did. I don't have my own child but I sleep beside two nephews that screams at night. Not literally scream, but you know what happened when two boys are playing all day. Expect a kick in your face or a loud talking.
2. Do you ever get to experience a kid who is scared and would go under your armpit? I did. I still do, every night.
3. Do you ever get to experience not to move when you sleep for if you do you would fall or you can't really move because in your right is a wall and in your left is a little boy sleeping about the age of 5? I do, every night indeed.
Honestly, it brings to me so much happiness to see them trust me. I am the cousin of their mother and yet, when I tell them I love them, they would "I love you" back at me. When you call them and ask for a hug they would hug you back. Tightly and you would want to squeeze them too.
I missed that when they first left Davao. I will miss that again when they will leave me again. I know sooner they will. But these are all just my feelings. I didn't ask them what and how they feel.
If you could only put yourself into their situation. They'll grow and see how happy their friends family is and they don't do that with their dad or mom, only with me, the cousin of their mom. Plus I am not with them the whole day. It would probably be a lifetime to discuss about this but it definitely hurts. It hurts for my side for everyday I have grown to love them. But to think about it, the hurt they feel would probably be 300% more than what I feel.
There are a lot of situations like this in any part of the world. Battling child custody, the mother always win but the father always come to the rescue especially when the mother sees an opportunity for her to work again or to remarry again. Like I said, what do you think the child might say?
To honestly think deeper, there are more consequences to this when they start growing up.
22.2.08
Imagine There's No Heaven
My Dad's favorite band, The Beatles, where John Lennon was a member and sang this song titled "Imagine". I was listening to this song last night after a talk over twitter with Jesse, a.k.a @jesatiu. We exchange thoughts on some violence not stressing on which violence, emotional, physical, et.al.
I was thinking, literally imagining, what would happen if the song would be for real?
I was thinking, literally imagining, what would happen if the song would be for real?
Imagine there's no Heaven
It's easy if you try
No hell below us
Above us only sky
Imagine all the people
Living for today
Imagine there's no countries
It isn't hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace
It's easy if you try
No hell below us
Above us only sky
Imagine all the people
Living for today
Imagine there's no countries
It isn't hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace
This is what we want right? We hate the government, we hate our neighbors, we wished there'd be no more killings or sufferings, and etc.
I am not trying to interpret what the meaning of the song is and I maybe wrong with the way I understand it. I think the song is telling me that I am not perfect. I wanted peace but I can not have peace for I am not at peace with my inner self, my surroundings, with the people close to me. I wanted to share the world but what makes me human is that I am being selective with what I try to share. No one in here can absolutely share 100% of his or her self to others because we got our very own responsibility as a parent to a child, a child to his or her parents, as a brother and as a sister. Not unless you are Jesus. (to the religious, sorry I do not intend to use the name of the Lord here. Just trying to make a point.)
Again, the song is trying to tell us that in giving a little of what we have should be given wholeheartedly. And since we can only do so little that we are all encourage to give what is the best that we can give and when everything is added starting from what I give, to what you give, to what others can give makes up a bigger deed that will be greatly appreciated by those who are given. Violence will never stop unless we don't cure the core of it's problem. It is not even a problem anymore, it is one kind of disease that has been with us for a long time.
Imagine no possessions
I wonder if you can
No need for greed or hunger
A brotherhood of man
Imagine all the people
Sharing all the world
I wonder if you can
No need for greed or hunger
A brotherhood of man
Imagine all the people
Sharing all the world
I am not trying to interpret what the meaning of the song is and I maybe wrong with the way I understand it. I think the song is telling me that I am not perfect. I wanted peace but I can not have peace for I am not at peace with my inner self, my surroundings, with the people close to me. I wanted to share the world but what makes me human is that I am being selective with what I try to share. No one in here can absolutely share 100% of his or her self to others because we got our very own responsibility as a parent to a child, a child to his or her parents, as a brother and as a sister. Not unless you are Jesus. (to the religious, sorry I do not intend to use the name of the Lord here. Just trying to make a point.)
Again, the song is trying to tell us that in giving a little of what we have should be given wholeheartedly. And since we can only do so little that we are all encourage to give what is the best that we can give and when everything is added starting from what I give, to what you give, to what others can give makes up a bigger deed that will be greatly appreciated by those who are given. Violence will never stop unless we don't cure the core of it's problem. It is not even a problem anymore, it is one kind of disease that has been with us for a long time.
You may say that I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will live as one
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will live as one
I can not absolutely say this will be achieved in time but how can this be started when no one will make a stand.
Why are women so sensitive?
A lot of guys have asked this question several times. There had been cases of break ups because of women being over sensitive. I'll say that again, over sensitive.
Guys, us girls, are not sensitive. Oh yeah, I can hear some reactions now.
Here are some that may help you.
Girls love to be appreciated all the time. Gifts are good but you have to give it little extra added affection in giving it. A doctor friend of mine said, girls experience mood swings which is part of being a girl because girls have the menstrual cycle. Frequent mood swings are symptoms of menopause so I hope your special girl is not in her menopausal stage.
Guy came in greeted his woman, "Hey! Honey. How's your day?". Either she just look at you or she said, "I'm not in the mood." You can ask her what happened and if she insist on not to talk about it then don't ask further questions. Don't say anything just stay beside her. If she's reading a book then read a book as well. Watching TV then watch TV with her, even if you don' t like Desperate Housewives or whatever that is. Slowly, she'll get near you and cuddle with you or she'll ask you questions that starts with, WHY. You can answer some questions though or just listen to her but never argue with what she's telling you. You can say "Maybe...(followed by what you would want to say)" after she took that deep breath and tone down her voice.
Guys, just let your girls be mad at you sometimes. It does not mean the end of the relationship. Girls, don't go too far with your sensitivity. You may lose your man if you are over sensitive.
One thing I would like to add though, don't end the night without talking about it.
Guys, us girls, are not sensitive. Oh yeah, I can hear some reactions now.
Here are some that may help you.
Girls love to be appreciated all the time. Gifts are good but you have to give it little extra added affection in giving it. A doctor friend of mine said, girls experience mood swings which is part of being a girl because girls have the menstrual cycle. Frequent mood swings are symptoms of menopause so I hope your special girl is not in her menopausal stage.
Guy came in greeted his woman, "Hey! Honey. How's your day?". Either she just look at you or she said, "I'm not in the mood." You can ask her what happened and if she insist on not to talk about it then don't ask further questions. Don't say anything just stay beside her. If she's reading a book then read a book as well. Watching TV then watch TV with her, even if you don' t like Desperate Housewives or whatever that is. Slowly, she'll get near you and cuddle with you or she'll ask you questions that starts with, WHY. You can answer some questions though or just listen to her but never argue with what she's telling you. You can say "Maybe...(followed by what you would want to say)" after she took that deep breath and tone down her voice.
Guys, just let your girls be mad at you sometimes. It does not mean the end of the relationship. Girls, don't go too far with your sensitivity. You may lose your man if you are over sensitive.
One thing I would like to add though, don't end the night without talking about it.
21.2.08
What's Inside Your Bag?
I would like to share the things inside my bag. I don't have pictures of them but I hope these pictures will help you visualize it.
Things inside my bag are:
Make up bag. Inside of the this bag are lipstick, powder, perfume, lotion, lip gloss, and etc.
I got one notebook inside my bag.
Vitamin C
Some CDs. Files from the office.
Wallet
Book by John Maxwell. Developing the leader within you
My checkbook. Don't leave home without it. (I don't own a credit card)
I am a book lover and I sometimes wear stilletos. (Lol)
What are inside the bag of a girl spells out who the girl is.
Things inside my bag are:
Make up bag. Inside of the this bag are lipstick, powder, perfume, lotion, lip gloss, and etc.
I got one notebook inside my bag.
Vitamin C
Some CDs. Files from the office.
Wallet
Book by John Maxwell. Developing the leader within you
My checkbook. Don't leave home without it. (I don't own a credit card)What the World Needs Now
Do you remember that song, What the world needs now is love? It is sang many times and yet we don't understand it.
I got a question to ask. Is it that hard to give love? Or you only choose those whom you will give love?
I have been reading a lot of articles on the web regarding violence, sexual assault, and anything to a degree of unlikeable to my conscious mind. Surely does tell me I am still lucky. Somehow it got me to thinking am I really lucky or I was unlucky? Ironic feelings isn't it? Lucky because I was not the victim. Unlucky because I have been reckoning life's difficulties that seems to be impassable.
I got a question to ask. Is it that hard to give love? Or you only choose those whom you will give love?
I have been reading a lot of articles on the web regarding violence, sexual assault, and anything to a degree of unlikeable to my conscious mind. Surely does tell me I am still lucky. Somehow it got me to thinking am I really lucky or I was unlucky? Ironic feelings isn't it? Lucky because I was not the victim. Unlucky because I have been reckoning life's difficulties that seems to be impassable.
What the world needs now is love, sweet love
It's the only thing that there's just too little of
What the world needs now is love, sweet love,
No not just for some but for everyone.
My other question is, how do we start giving love? Or spreading love?
It's the only thing that there's just too little of
What the world needs now is love, sweet love,
No not just for some but for everyone.
My other question is, how do we start giving love? Or spreading love?
20.2.08
Sick
I am sick
literally
very sunny in the morning
getting dark around 9 am
rain starts to fall at 10 am
goes heavy till the afternoon
I am sick
with politics
they love Obama
I don't know Obama
Bush endorses McCain
Who is he?
I am sick
with life
no matter how hard you do
someone still pulling you down
it don't even matter to them
they'll say, Who the f**k are you?
I am sick
with dreaming
it always make me weak
maybe because it shows me what I want
but it never happens
and I'm so sick of that
I am sick
with loving
you give
but no one appreciate it.
you share
but one will get jealous
I am sick
literally
literally
very sunny in the morning
getting dark around 9 am
rain starts to fall at 10 am
goes heavy till the afternoon
I am sick
with politics
they love Obama
I don't know Obama
Bush endorses McCain
Who is he?
I am sick
with life
no matter how hard you do
someone still pulling you down
it don't even matter to them
they'll say, Who the f**k are you?
I am sick
with dreaming
it always make me weak
maybe because it shows me what I want
but it never happens
and I'm so sick of that
I am sick
with loving
you give
but no one appreciate it.
you share
but one will get jealous
I am sick
literally
19.2.08
Dreaming
And so the dreams are just dreams
And so the dreams are hopes
And so hopes are just dreams
And so hopes and dreams resides where?
And so we can't make dreams come true?
And so dreams coming true are luck
And so luck are for some people
And so luck are not for everyone
And so are we unlucky?
And so some lucky people can no longer be reached
And so the unlucky ones are struggling to be like the lucky ones
And so the lucky ones are calling us fools
And so we are just dreaming
And so we are just hoping
And so dreaming
And so hoping
And so the dreams are hopes
And so hopes are just dreams
And so hopes and dreams resides where?
And so we can't make dreams come true?
And so dreams coming true are luck
And so luck are for some people
And so luck are not for everyone
And so are we unlucky?
And so some lucky people can no longer be reached
And so the unlucky ones are struggling to be like the lucky ones
And so the lucky ones are calling us fools
And so we are just dreaming
And so we are just hoping
And so dreaming
And so hoping
Random Thoughts....
I feel alive again....
I would like to..
Do I have to ask?
Is it gonna be a yes?
Or should I wait for *** to ask...
** said it's easier to ask now...
Do I have to wait?
Is it gonna be right to be involve again after the heartache?
Do I have to care about the past?
It is the past so I dumped it..
The battle of my heart and mind
increasing heart's beat to vanish doubting thoughts
struggling what should be done first
can't move, would want to move
sunshine it is
but there's sunset
and so the body rest for awhile
but the heart keeps on beating
while the mind is at rest
I am happy but am still afraid to ask
should I ask or should I give it awhile...
breaking the heart is easy
but giving the heart again is hard
would you dance with me?
or should I say it relentlessly..
and honestly
Maybe later
Not now for sure
later is better..
who should I choose?
that one
this one
or the another one
can't make up yet
I like this one
I like that one too
not the other one for **'s no longer free
this one is vocal
that one is not even sure what **'s feelings are
should I follow my heart?
or I should give time?
for I need time as well..
I would like to..
Do I have to ask?
Is it gonna be a yes?
Or should I wait for *** to ask...
** said it's easier to ask now...
Do I have to wait?
Is it gonna be right to be involve again after the heartache?
Do I have to care about the past?
It is the past so I dumped it..
The battle of my heart and mind
increasing heart's beat to vanish doubting thoughts
struggling what should be done first
can't move, would want to move
sunshine it is
but there's sunset
and so the body rest for awhile
but the heart keeps on beating
while the mind is at rest
I am happy but am still afraid to ask
should I ask or should I give it awhile...
breaking the heart is easy
but giving the heart again is hard
would you dance with me?
or should I say it relentlessly..
and honestly
Maybe later
Not now for sure
later is better..
who should I choose?
that one
this one
or the another one
can't make up yet
I like this one
I like that one too
not the other one for **'s no longer free
this one is vocal
that one is not even sure what **'s feelings are
should I follow my heart?
or I should give time?
for I need time as well..
16.2.08
Precious Friendship
Me and my college buddies never get tired of talking again and again the foolishness during college days.
If we do hang out together, we will probably stay at a coffee shop or someplace to eat and just talk.
I hope the group will last for a lifetime.
If we do hang out together, we will probably stay at a coffee shop or someplace to eat and just talk.
I hope the group will last for a lifetime.
Gratitude
My cousin, Achi Michelle, posted her very own words about gratitude. Now, here's what I say about gratitude.
Often people, when faced with too much luck, they talk about gratitude to almost everyone who has helped them for it truly made them better. Then stop saying thank you after a while, I must say they have said it why would you have to say it again.
Gratitude does not end with saying thank you. It does not end by merely saying it out loud but with how you will react it after saying thank you. It is easier said than done. Amazing it is to see one saying thank you after helping him and then turns his back on you and after a day or two that person does not even know what you have done to him.
I would like to say thank you to the following:
1. God
2. Mom
3. Dad
4. Siblings
5. Mamu
6. Cousins
7. Friends (Gaburongza, Boink, Chat, Daisy, Mitch)
8. New found friends online (Shawn, Jesse, Amanda)
Often people, when faced with too much luck, they talk about gratitude to almost everyone who has helped them for it truly made them better. Then stop saying thank you after a while, I must say they have said it why would you have to say it again.
Gratitude does not end with saying thank you. It does not end by merely saying it out loud but with how you will react it after saying thank you. It is easier said than done. Amazing it is to see one saying thank you after helping him and then turns his back on you and after a day or two that person does not even know what you have done to him.
I would like to say thank you to the following:
1. God
2. Mom
3. Dad
4. Siblings
5. Mamu
6. Cousins
7. Friends (Gaburongza, Boink, Chat, Daisy, Mitch)
8. New found friends online (Shawn, Jesse, Amanda)
15.2.08
Bless the Broken Road
My twitter buddy, @jesatiu, gave me this song.
Apparently, it made me cry. Indeed God bless the broken road, but right now, with what has been done, northern star no longer leads me back to you. Northern star might have someone else for me and I am quite excited to see that. I'm all open arms now. I welcome anybody who would boldly would ask me to dance.
I like that beat of the heart when you don't know what's next to one thing but you are sure this and that will happen only because you have seen it in the eyes of that person. Of course, you would know if he don't like you.
This is the part that I like for it is not just applicable to any broken hearted but it is actually for anything that you feel right now. You wouldn't be happy now if you were not sad yesterday. Or you wouldn't be who you are now if nobody stooped you down before. Or you wouldn't be stronger now if you weren't dumped yesterday.
It simply says, there is far more better man for me. Could it be you? (hmmmm.....)
Apparently, it made me cry. Indeed God bless the broken road, but right now, with what has been done, northern star no longer leads me back to you. Northern star might have someone else for me and I am quite excited to see that. I'm all open arms now. I welcome anybody who would boldly would ask me to dance.
I like that beat of the heart when you don't know what's next to one thing but you are sure this and that will happen only because you have seen it in the eyes of that person. Of course, you would know if he don't like you.
Every long lost dream lead me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
This is the part that I like for it is not just applicable to any broken hearted but it is actually for anything that you feel right now. You wouldn't be happy now if you were not sad yesterday. Or you wouldn't be who you are now if nobody stooped you down before. Or you wouldn't be stronger now if you weren't dumped yesterday.
It simply says, there is far more better man for me. Could it be you? (hmmmm.....)
Ponkans from Jim
Ponkans, ponkans, ponkans
Don't want to eat them just stare at them.
Thanks Doc for the pictures.
This is Dr. Jim Haw. Picture taken at Basti's Brew14.2.08
5 Things I have Learned about Love
It is that time of the year where LOVE is the main subject thus giving people smiles and blushes the whole day. Long kisses and sex later at night. Yes, it is Valentine's Day, the day of love for the whole world.
How many times have you fallen in and out of love? For me, I have fallen a couple of times. Fallen out of love a couple times as well. Reading a lot of fairy tales made me think of what an ideal man for me. But I was hurt by my past experience, it got me to thinking that loving someone or giving love to someone aren't taught in books or any thing that is written but they are found by really letting yourself fall in love and fall out of love and be hurt.
I am pretty sure you will not agree with me and you could say your mother knows better, but the nuggets of these learnings are taken from the act of an individual to be involve, in love, with another person.
Here are some things I personally learned from falling in love.
1. Always communicate. Never miss a day without telling the person you love what you feel about him or her. Take the initiative to get the ball rolling.
2. Negative thoughts about him or her always brings your relationship down. It is natural for a person to react but contain your emotions. It is a better way to start talking.
3. Enjoy each others company. If you don't enjoy the moments that you are together, it will be a boring relationship.
4. Money brings happiness so does it creates a big problem. Learn to share. Do pay some of the expenses especially when you are watching movies.
5. Kiss and saying I love you. If you don't love the person then why do want to get near him or her? Why do you always call him or her? Why do you want to his or her company?
I know it hurts a lot when you tried your best and broke up in the end. It is better to have loved than not to have loved at all.
How many times have you fallen in and out of love? For me, I have fallen a couple of times. Fallen out of love a couple times as well. Reading a lot of fairy tales made me think of what an ideal man for me. But I was hurt by my past experience, it got me to thinking that loving someone or giving love to someone aren't taught in books or any thing that is written but they are found by really letting yourself fall in love and fall out of love and be hurt.
I am pretty sure you will not agree with me and you could say your mother knows better, but the nuggets of these learnings are taken from the act of an individual to be involve, in love, with another person.
Here are some things I personally learned from falling in love.
1. Always communicate. Never miss a day without telling the person you love what you feel about him or her. Take the initiative to get the ball rolling.
2. Negative thoughts about him or her always brings your relationship down. It is natural for a person to react but contain your emotions. It is a better way to start talking.
3. Enjoy each others company. If you don't enjoy the moments that you are together, it will be a boring relationship.
4. Money brings happiness so does it creates a big problem. Learn to share. Do pay some of the expenses especially when you are watching movies.
5. Kiss and saying I love you. If you don't love the person then why do want to get near him or her? Why do you always call him or her? Why do you want to his or her company?
I know it hurts a lot when you tried your best and broke up in the end. It is better to have loved than not to have loved at all.
13.2.08
They've asked me, "Why do you smile always?"
In the first 15 years of my life, I am the snob type of person. I thought my family is ok and we are surviving even more than the average family that lived in this small country. Contrary to my beliefs, my parents are both working for my future as well as three other siblings in my family. I was enrolled to a private school in my grade school years and in a all girls school in high school years. Being in the crowd of people who's family really deserve to be called rich, I consider my family as one of them. But my family is better for Dad will be home during dinner and Mom would make breakfast and dinner for all of us. We would be all seated on the table when 7am or 7pm strikes. No one explained to me the real situation, maybe because I am still young. I will soon be graduating in high school when I found out that life was the other side of the coin. Both parents worked hard because they got to be and to be able to feed us all four.
When Mom decided to work abroad, leaving me, the eldest to lead and start doing what she has been doing as a mother. Few months after, she died. I woke up from the truth. And I've realized that it is not too late for me to win the game of life.
I was once knocked down but I will try not to be knocked down again. I will try to discover what the other side of life has for me. I live my life like a coin. I maybe seeing one side of the coin, but I would not like to pass on what the other side of the coin has for me. It can be good or bad but I know, neither of them sides are all bad or good. I maybe in a bad situation now, that only means the other side is good so it gives me a chance to make better my situation and that gives me smiles on my face.
They've asked me, "Why do you smile always?"
I said, " I smile always because if I would let myself frown it only means I'm defeated." Life, like they always say it, is a challenge. And challenges are battles to win. Smiling is actually one way of intimidating life.
When Mom decided to work abroad, leaving me, the eldest to lead and start doing what she has been doing as a mother. Few months after, she died. I woke up from the truth. And I've realized that it is not too late for me to win the game of life.
I was once knocked down but I will try not to be knocked down again. I will try to discover what the other side of life has for me. I live my life like a coin. I maybe seeing one side of the coin, but I would not like to pass on what the other side of the coin has for me. It can be good or bad but I know, neither of them sides are all bad or good. I maybe in a bad situation now, that only means the other side is good so it gives me a chance to make better my situation and that gives me smiles on my face.
They've asked me, "Why do you smile always?"
I said, " I smile always because if I would let myself frown it only means I'm defeated." Life, like they always say it, is a challenge. And challenges are battles to win. Smiling is actually one way of intimidating life.
Smile tho' your heart is aching,
Smile even tho' it's breaking,
When there are clouds in the sky
You'll get by,
If you smile
thro' your fear and sorrow,
Smile and maybe tomorrow,
You'll see the sun come shin-ing thro' for you
Light up your face with gladness,
Hide ev-'ry trace of sadness,
Al -'tho a tear may be ever so near,
That's the time,
You must keep on trying,
Smile, what's the use of crying,
You'll find that life is still worth-while,
If you just smile...
Epilogue: The Different Kind of Love Story
February is always associated with loving couple cuddling each other endlessly and wishing the night of February 14 would never end.
Leaders love their followers is another kind of love story. The employer loves her employees because the company sales is going up and this is another kind of love story. One thing I know is that the difference between playing to win and playing not to lose is the difference between success and mediocrity.
A leader can be successful if he has made the right change and thus get the smaller part of credits, but if things didn't worked out, would get the greater part of blame. Also goes the same way for the employers.
The love story that I am talking about here is the love story between you and your inner being. The main point is, you can not love someone unless you love yourself first. Neither a leader can be a leader when he or she is not leading himself or herself.
Let us start giving to ourself first before we start giving to others. And before February 14 comes, give yourself a break and share something to yourself too.
Leaders love their followers is another kind of love story. The employer loves her employees because the company sales is going up and this is another kind of love story. One thing I know is that the difference between playing to win and playing not to lose is the difference between success and mediocrity.
A leader can be successful if he has made the right change and thus get the smaller part of credits, but if things didn't worked out, would get the greater part of blame. Also goes the same way for the employers.
The love story that I am talking about here is the love story between you and your inner being. The main point is, you can not love someone unless you love yourself first. Neither a leader can be a leader when he or she is not leading himself or herself.
Let us start giving to ourself first before we start giving to others. And before February 14 comes, give yourself a break and share something to yourself too.
12.2.08
Tragic February Valentine Story
I have been mad about what happened to my love life. There is no greater sorrow for this husband his wife died in his arms during the Greek song that means "Love Me" is playing.
Kim Sjostrom died of heart disease.
Kim Sjostrom died of heart disease.
For me it was like any other celebrity weddings but not based on how expensive the wedding is but how the wedding had became a project at Davie Elementary School, where Sjostrom taught first grade. Friends provided the wedding gown, the flowers and decorations.
Isn't it sweet when your love ones and friends are there to help you with the wedding. Not just helping but providing you with some of the wedding things you needed.
The couple where dancing, when Kim complained of being lightheaded. Teddy, the husband, thought Kim, a diabetic, needed sugar. But she collapsed. The nearby hospital were unable to revive her.9.2.08
Me and My Big Mouth
Was there ever a situation when you are trying to impress someone and you sounded like stupid in front of that person?
Just wanted to tell you this but alright it is none of your business. Fuck! Me and my big mouth.....
Hahahaha.....
Just wanted to tell you this but alright it is none of your business. Fuck! Me and my big mouth.....
Hahahaha.....
7.2.08
No Other Way
There had been many times when you tried to do something and yet there is no progress and you felt like giving up.
You have too much confidence that you can do this. No matter how many times you tried and others keep on saying you have to let it go, still you hang on to it and still tried to do it despite the fact that there is no support from the others. You tell yourself, I can do this....I can and I will.
No doubt you can do things beyond your expectations but you, me and them are humans and we are not perfect. There may be times that we were able to do things and made us feel we are a hero. But it will never happen all the time. There will be times and you know that this time, you can not do it.
There is no other way but to quit. Truly, it is heartbreaking when you decide to quit but it is more noble to be able to quit now than try doing it again and again. You will never know you will be able to accomplish it in the future. You might just need more time to study and think and maybe go to the basic.
You have too much confidence that you can do this. No matter how many times you tried and others keep on saying you have to let it go, still you hang on to it and still tried to do it despite the fact that there is no support from the others. You tell yourself, I can do this....I can and I will.
No doubt you can do things beyond your expectations but you, me and them are humans and we are not perfect. There may be times that we were able to do things and made us feel we are a hero. But it will never happen all the time. There will be times and you know that this time, you can not do it.
There is no other way but to quit. Truly, it is heartbreaking when you decide to quit but it is more noble to be able to quit now than try doing it again and again. You will never know you will be able to accomplish it in the future. You might just need more time to study and think and maybe go to the basic.
6.2.08
February Love
Enormous when you feel it. You feel flying when you are in it. You are blooming everyday. Your mornings are like one new day to celebrate.
The never ending promise of being in love. So good when you have someone to give love to. You never thought you can do this for him or her. Red roses, chocolates, kisses and "I love you" are always present during this time of the year. The February Love where most couples celebrate an intimate and passionate time for themselves.
Hotel rooms are booked. Flower prices goes up. Chocolates are everywhere. Red is the color of the month.
Does anyone know that the color red means hot, can increase the rate of respiration and raising blood pressure. When we see color red, by culture, it means power. When we use red, it grabs attention and to get people to take action. No wonder Red is worn during Chinese New Year.
(Hmmmm...I should wear red everyday.)
The never ending promise of being in love. So good when you have someone to give love to. You never thought you can do this for him or her. Red roses, chocolates, kisses and "I love you" are always present during this time of the year. The February Love where most couples celebrate an intimate and passionate time for themselves.
Hotel rooms are booked. Flower prices goes up. Chocolates are everywhere. Red is the color of the month.
Does anyone know that the color red means hot, can increase the rate of respiration and raising blood pressure. When we see color red, by culture, it means power. When we use red, it grabs attention and to get people to take action. No wonder Red is worn during Chinese New Year.
(Hmmmm...I should wear red everyday.)
4.2.08
Time to Change
Everyone desires to change the world but no one would want to start the change within themselves. It is ironic for one to change the world if he can't change himself.
Changes can be seen as either revolutionary (something totally different from what has been) and evolutionary (a refinement from what has been). It is usually easy to accept change as a simple refinement from what is usually done than to accept an entirely different or new changes.
Most of us don't want to change because change may mean personal loss and change requires additional commitment. Often it is describe like this joke: "How many people does it change a light bulb?" Answer. "Four. One to change the light bulb and three to think of how good the old light bulb was."
The same thing happen to us who would think of the past than to move on and make change. There is no change that is so easy to do but when we are all convince to change we slowly adapt and when we are all doing it, we didn't realize that there is something else to do. We got stuck at what we usually do. Even some of us, during job interviews says, "I don't like a routine job." But when you are in that job for 2 years you seemed to like what your doing. Funny but true.
Is it time to change? When do we need to change? What should be changed?
To quote:
Changes can be seen as either revolutionary (something totally different from what has been) and evolutionary (a refinement from what has been). It is usually easy to accept change as a simple refinement from what is usually done than to accept an entirely different or new changes.
Most of us don't want to change because change may mean personal loss and change requires additional commitment. Often it is describe like this joke: "How many people does it change a light bulb?" Answer. "Four. One to change the light bulb and three to think of how good the old light bulb was."
The same thing happen to us who would think of the past than to move on and make change. There is no change that is so easy to do but when we are all convince to change we slowly adapt and when we are all doing it, we didn't realize that there is something else to do. We got stuck at what we usually do. Even some of us, during job interviews says, "I don't like a routine job." But when you are in that job for 2 years you seemed to like what your doing. Funny but true.
Is it time to change? When do we need to change? What should be changed?
To quote:
The wrong decision at the wrong time = DISASTER.
The wrong decision at the right time = MISTAKE.
The right decision at the wrong time = UNACCEPTANCE.
The right decision at the right time = SUCCESS.
- John Maxwell, The Winning Attitude
Getting Over You
My space was doing fine when you were not yet part of it. My space was gloomy and laughter is louder now than before. I was not looking for it but it came and entered the space I have been trying to protect from strangers like you. And I welcomed a stranger.
It was indeed a beautiful experience. I have sailed the sea wherein I fall, I cried, I laughed, I was broken hearted and now I am getting over you. Funny thing is that I smile every time I see something that reminds me of you. I definitely can say, I have moved on.
It is better to have loved and lost than to never loved at all. At least I was honest, and I hope you are too. If you're not, you will get to experience guilt and it may lead to heart attack. (I say, Good Luck!)
My sentiments for this heartache will stop. It will start by the time I posted this.
It was indeed a beautiful experience. I have sailed the sea wherein I fall, I cried, I laughed, I was broken hearted and now I am getting over you. Funny thing is that I smile every time I see something that reminds me of you. I definitely can say, I have moved on.
It is better to have loved and lost than to never loved at all. At least I was honest, and I hope you are too. If you're not, you will get to experience guilt and it may lead to heart attack. (I say, Good Luck!)
My sentiments for this heartache will stop. It will start by the time I posted this.
3.2.08
Microsoft wants Yahoo
Now here's another story for a possible billion purchase of one giant company, Microsoft.
Yahoo was the first search engine that I love. When Yahoo said that they have to spend $300 million this year just to revive the company, Microsoft wrote the board and offered 62% above Yahoo's closing share price. Microsoft's Kevin Johnson said that the combination will better compete Google.
At Yahoo, there had been a lot of executive quiting their position and there had been an announcement of the intention to lay-off 1,000 staff as part of the company's restructuring plan. With Yahoo shares going down, it will definitely have to study Microsoft's offer in a close door meeting.
If this happens, what can be its name?
Here's more of the story. Microsoft wants to purchase Yahoo.
Yahoo was the first search engine that I love. When Yahoo said that they have to spend $300 million this year just to revive the company, Microsoft wrote the board and offered 62% above Yahoo's closing share price. Microsoft's Kevin Johnson said that the combination will better compete Google.
At Yahoo, there had been a lot of executive quiting their position and there had been an announcement of the intention to lay-off 1,000 staff as part of the company's restructuring plan. With Yahoo shares going down, it will definitely have to study Microsoft's offer in a close door meeting.
If this happens, what can be its name?
Here's more of the story. Microsoft wants to purchase Yahoo.
1.2.08
Feeling the Love Month
Is the month of February an emo month?
For sure there will be color red everywhere. Hearts and here and there. The prices of flowers will go up again. There will be chocolates too.
I hate the 2008 February month. Why? I hate it because my 4 year relationship ended last month. So I don't like to see others being sweet with their partner.
I don't particularly feel the love month. What I feel now is sadness and being lonely again. The good thing about this is that I am working too hard now just to forget and let go. It is working but it is working slowly. I would like to wake up one day that I am practically happy about the fact that I have the chance to love someone again.
I am happy with work, with life, but not happy in heart. When I started announcing that I am single again, there are a lot of people whom I turned my back on when I was with that relationship, were the same people who supported me. The people whom I thought were against me, were the people who gave me flowers and bracelet and chocolates.
What about you? What is your feeling about the love month?
For sure there will be color red everywhere. Hearts and here and there. The prices of flowers will go up again. There will be chocolates too.
I hate the 2008 February month. Why? I hate it because my 4 year relationship ended last month. So I don't like to see others being sweet with their partner.
I don't particularly feel the love month. What I feel now is sadness and being lonely again. The good thing about this is that I am working too hard now just to forget and let go. It is working but it is working slowly. I would like to wake up one day that I am practically happy about the fact that I have the chance to love someone again.
I am happy with work, with life, but not happy in heart. When I started announcing that I am single again, there are a lot of people whom I turned my back on when I was with that relationship, were the same people who supported me. The people whom I thought were against me, were the people who gave me flowers and bracelet and chocolates.
What about you? What is your feeling about the love month?
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